Seeking Purpose

Lost is an understatement.

2019, so far, is full of realisations. Thankfully, my anxiety has been friendly and I haven’t had any major attack yet, and little by little, I am beginning to figure what I really want, or at least what I want at the moment.

Adulthood is a process I am both lucky and unlucky to go through. At this point, I have made the questions where am I supposed to be? What do I want? Why am I still here? How do I escape? And many more questions that I can’t seem to find the answer. But maybe adulthood isn’t really about finding the answers, rather asking more, until you find it.

To be honest, I can’t feel any fulfillment with what I am doing right now. Maybe it’s too stiff. Maybe it’s not the right place for me. Maybe I’m just not used to it. Maybe I’m just bored. Maybe, maybe… Maybe. It’s a stage full of maybe’s. But this time, I am determined to find the yes or the no to these maybe’s.

I haven’t found my purpose yet, but I know I will. I may not find fulfillment with what I am doing right now, but I won’t stop in seeking things that will make me feel like I did something really worthy, and that I made a good influence.

One day, maybe sooner or maybe later, I’ll share something in this blog, finally saying, “I’ve found it.”

Five Things I’ve Realized When I Began to Embrace the “I’m a few minutes away from the office” Life

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It’s been more than a month since I moved to my place in the Metro. I’m less than 15 minutes away from the office, far beyond what I used to travel when I still go home daily. I used to spend one to two hours travel time commuting ever since I began working, and since I have experienced the convenience of living near my work place, I’m not sure if I’m ever gonna want to leave that life again.

Living near my workplace has made me realize a lot of things, and I’m going to share five of them here. 🙂

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Tough

I thought it was easier
To be a grown up
And do what you love;
But it was easier
To define “love”
When I was younger.