I just feel so anxious right now. 22 days to go and it’s the Day of the Battle – my battle against myself. Until now I haven’t yet gained the enough confidence, and I don’t think I’ll ever have it. But at least, I’m trying my best to compensate it with the leap of faith that I am taking.
I have never been the Best in Accounting inside the room. I have joined one accounting quiz bee in junior college (JPIA-PLM‘s Theomacia) and yeah I was thankful for the experience but dude I’m really not for such things. I gained myself through other stuff like writing, debates and stage performances, and for the least excelling there made me feel that I am NOT a loser.
I don’t know how to contain the mixed emotions inside me at the moment so I thought one blog post would at least keep me on my track. I’ve had a light anxiety attack yesterday and I’m glad I was able to catch a friend who’s also gonna take the CPA Board Exam who’s also having some self-complications because of pressure to talk about it.
Tomorrow’s our Final Pre-board Examination. It’s supposed to be the “main trial” before taking the CPA Board Exam. I’m wearing no confidence that I’ll be able to pass it like our First Pre-board, but I am again bringing with me a lot of prayers and hopefulness that St. Claire and St. Jude, together with our Lord GOD the Father and Mama Mary, would bless me with enough miracles to make it through and pass it.
Oo, top or pass yung hiling ko. Pero exaggeration ko lang talaga naman yun eh. Kahit pasang awa na lang ako, magiging masaya na ako. Sino ba naman kasi ako para humingi ng malaki diba? Hindi naman over yung effort na binigay ko. Puro pa nga ako reklamo. Ang dami ko pang hindi magandang nagawa. As in ngayon, sobrang please, kahit sumabit na lang talaga ako sa list of passers, kahit ako yung pang-huli sa rank ng mga papasa, maging CPA lang ako ngayong OCTOBER. In the end, oo, magma-matter kung magta-top ka, sa job offers, sa work, pero kung CPA ka, kahit ikaw pa yung pinakamahina sa lahat ng mga CPA na makikilala mo, CPA ka pa rin. Hindi ka man sa field na yun mag-excel, nakuha mo yung title. Meaning, kung di man dahil sa sipag o talino mo, baka tadhana mo na talaga yun siguro.